My parents just celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary this week. If you know them, you know they are truly extraordinary people. They are also terrific parents – and now, wonderful grandparents. I was reminded again tonight how unbelievably wise they are. Po Bronson, author of NurtureShock was interviewed on Nightline tonight about the damage that is being done to children because of the "praise addiction" of the adults around them. Researchers have discovered that telling children how smart they are actually causes children to fear challenge and avoid opportunities for learning and growth so that they will continue to appear smart! (Click here to read more on the interview)
My parents didn’t need the PhD researchers at Stanford and Columbia or Bronson’s NurtureShock to show them this truth. When my sister was in elementary school, she was placed in new program the school district started for students with high IQs. My parents never told her why she had been placed in that class. They kept the same even hand they had always had, making learning fun, challenging us, learning with us, and encouraging us to explore all of our interests and dreams.
One day my sister came home from school and told mom that one of the kids in the program said the reason they were put in there is because they were smarter than the other kids. She wanted to know if this was true. My mother looked at my sister and said, “Well, what do you think? Do you think that you are smarter than the kids who are not in that class?” My sister thought for a minute and said “No, I don’t think so.” My mother’s reply was “Well, then I guess you will just have to work hard and do your very best.”
It worked pretty well - my sister is now a pediatrician - and a mother raising a child to love growing the brain!
It worked pretty well - my sister is now a pediatrician - and a mother raising a child to love growing the brain!
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